Who Am I?

If you’re curious about my AuDHD diagnosis story, you can find that on the blog.

Otherwise, here’s the highlight reel…

If I’m not learning something new, I’m bored as hell. When I’m really into something, I need to know everything about it. Stat. I have degrees in Political Science, Anthropology, Education, and most of a master’s in Human Development.  I finished all the course work and quit shortly before defending my thesis because long story short, undiagnosed Autistic & ADHD. 

I was an elementary school teacher for almost 10 years. I loved teaching, but not the system. I quit because again, undiagnosed Autistic & ADHD, and compounding life stressors, which all led to a profound case of what I now know as autistic burnout. During my teaching career, I worked with a lot of neurodivergent kids. Wish I knew then what I know now.

When I left teaching of my own accord, but not really, because the situation wasn’t sustainable, I worked in a public healthcare agency as a Talent Development Specialist (staff trainer/educator). The day I got moved to the sensory hell of ‘Cubicle Land’ because someone more important needed my office, was the beginning of the end for me there. About four years in I quit because, well, undiagnosed Autistic & ADHD. 

Are you detecting the pattern here?  Funny, because nobody else did. Not one teacher, doctor, therapist, professor, or other professional I encountered in over 50 years.

In no particular order, and for varying lengths of time, I’ve also been a childcare worker, graduate teaching assistant, radio hostess, resource development coordinator, nanny, house painter, dietary aide, retail salesperson, soap maker, cinnamon bun baker, event coordinator, restaurant server, voice over artist, life coach, astrologer, facilitator and consultant.

My longer-term intense passions (a.k.a special interests) include food and cooking, human behaviour – all the ‘ologys’ - archeology, anthropology, sociology, psychology, astrology, and human rights/social justice. I’ve always been a creative and an educator in some form. For the past few years, and for obvious reasons, Autism, ADHD, and all things neurodivergence have my nearly undivided (monotropic) attention.

Other interests (hyper-focuses) have come and gone and come again.

I love music and wish I’d learned to sing or play an instrument with some level of skill. Sadly, air guitar doesn’t count. I also love to dance. Turns out it’s stimmy and it regulates my nervous system. I don’t do it enough anymore. Almost never. 

You can usually find me anywhere around food and drink, where there’s a good chance I’ll also be talking about anything food and drink. 

You might also find me immersed in nature, talking to animals, plants, the sky, and occasionally inanimate objects. Otherwise, I’m binging a good TV series or watching a documentary with my husband and cat, listening to podcasts, reading (mostly) non-fiction, getting cozy in front of the fireplace, writing lists and other things, researching whatever has my current attention, and having deep conversations about meaningful stuff – most often with my neurokin. 

I have no patience for small talk, but I’m skilled at it from years of practice. I can pretend (mask) like my life depends on it, because sometimes it feels like it does. I’m highly agitated by lack of planning, hierarchical nonsense, willful ignorance, dishonesty, random/illogical rules, policies and procedures, and trying to explain myself to people who’ve already made up their minds not to hear me.

Last minute pivots (unless my brain is craving dopamine and my nervous system is chilled out), people who show up at the door unannounced, making or receiving unplanned phone calls, and being interrupted when I’m in the zone, are among the things that spark anxiety beyond base level.

I have a love-hate relationship with routine and schedules. I get anxious leaving my comfort zone but crave adventure. My brain needs novelty and problems to solve. But also, predictability is a big yes. Uncertainty, no thank you.  Overwhelm and boredom are both kryptonite. So is too much or too little stimulation. Socializing is good when I’m up for it, but I need a lot of alone time to recover. My life is a constant tug of war between shiny and new vs. tried and true. I’m a paradox. A walking contradiction. Organized chaos. Always have been. Now, 50+ years in, it finally all makes sense. Better late than never? Definitely. Would I have preferred sooner? 100%

One of the things about being AuDHD is that I have a hard time figuring out what information is relevant, and what’s unnecessary or way too much. I have a bajillion other things I could tell you here, but I think those are details and stories for other days.